BIRTHWEEK

RIVERDECK TONIGHT!!! Oh my god i have been waiting all week. Except for Friday, when I went there AGAIN with Downtown Kimmy Brown. Thanks to everyone for making my 2008 Birthday Season the best ever. Some highlights:

- Chelsea's new name is "Feather"

- "Oh, you got stuck at Transit? That sucks."
"I wouldn't say 'got stuck.' I would say that I was given an opportunity to discover new people." (that would be Dave)

- Nobody would let me buy myself drinks at the Barbary

- The best boyfriend ever took me to the Cantina for my birthday--that's not funny; it's just awesome

- Siobhan told me she had been to the Cantina twice the day before (that's like me and the Riverdeck)

- Huge turnout at the Riverdeck, plus a mass e-mail from the promoter that said "Tonight is Andy Crowley from Rustica's birthday so come out and party with him!!!"

- Woods danced; Josh Ballard danced

- Ben and maybe Chris threw hot wax all over my livingroom

- meeting my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend; liking her

- "My boyfriend's in West Virginia. I HATE WEST VIRGINIA!"
Virginia, turning around: "What??"

- afternoon Riverdecking with Kimmy Brown and Ben; $2 insulated bottles of Bud Light; bad fashion show at F.U.E.L.; scouring the streets for Kimmy's credit card; eating a chorizo taco "Lady-and-the-Tramp" style with Kimmy outside of Johnny Brenda's; during Dan's show, sending texts to Kimmy and Ben telling them to punch each other in the face (you should see Ben; he's covered in bruises); Dan's show being awesome; James Brown.

-Marilyn sent me this on myspace:

some funny recap of last night...

ben gallman mosh pit. i think he was very happy to get that party started.

tommy gets messy: we decide to chug our beers so we can leave for the barbary but halfway thru i've had enough. he cannot accept that and tries to force it on me. i toss the little sip i have left over my shoulder to be funny, and he pours his HALF PINT on my head. woods and ben gallman rescue me. then at barbary he's messier, bumping into everybody. so dave p pours his beer on him. funny.

chris and i walk home and find ourselves in the middle of what seems to be a drug bust. drunken loiterers are told that if they didn't
"walk away, (the "agents") would flatten them too." they say this while kneeling on 2 suspects.

- I was simultaneously at three parties on Saturday and kept biking back and forth, delivering burgers and vodka.

- Faggot water balloon wars.

- Got hit by a car. My front bike wheel bent in half; the woman just kept saying, "I'm not from the city! I'm not from the city!"

- Birthday season officially ended last night with Ricky's birthday. We took him to a terrifying neighborhood bar that opened just for us, with men outside shouting that they "liked our style" and making menacing looks any time they used the bathroom; then we stayed up all night and Ricky, Amelia and I somehow got into an Ella Fitzgerald sing-a-long. They outlasted me, and I biked home and fell asleep, vowing to have a shorter birthday season next year. I'm wiped.

Who am I kidding? See you tonight at the Riverdeck!!!

Jaded Youth

Angela and I have been best friends since we were three. She married Jason, whom we have both been friends with since we were about six. Since we all grew up together, I never feel like a third wheel around them. It's just three old friends hanging out. Not everyone gets that.

Yesterday, Ang, Jason and their two kids show up to stay with me for a couple nights while they go to a bike race in Fairmount Park. Last night, we are sitting out on my patio sharing a couple of pints and tons of conversation when their 4-year-old son asks Jason, "Dad, why do you like Genna more than Mom?"

Are kids really that paranoid?

The Warmest House in Fishtown

Thanks for the great housewarming!! What I remember from the night:

10) Dane showed up an hour and half after the "no earlier than" time. But he was still an hour earlier than anyone else!! He asked if I'd rather he come back later. I said, if he didn't care that he was the only one here than he was welcome to stay. I recommend your first party guest be someone you know, but not that well...you get to know each other a lot better.

9) Neighbors: "Why's that guy sitting behind the curtains?
Me: I don't know.

Ben G, why were you sitting behind the curtains?

8) Taking a few pictures at the beginning of the night and then loosing my camera. When I found it at the end of the night, there were a lot of funny (and some inappropriate) pictures. For those of you who had my camera at some point, thanks for showing me what you were up to while I was not in the room!

8) Not being able to find Byron anywhere. Then finding out Josh M. just randomly decided to leave the party to take Byron for a walk. Just because.

6) Ben G rushing outside to ask me if I knew my soap had lavender in it and that men should never wash their hands with lavender.
Ben: "Lavender has been known to cause men to grow boobs."
Me: "Really? I wash my hands everyday with that stuff. How come it doesn't work for women?"
Dane: "Maybe you should try washing something else with it."

5) Matt Beck and Byron sharing a popsicle like two teenagers in love.

4) Two people coming out of my studio adjusting their clothes and looking confused that it is so quiet. Yah....um....everyone left like 5 minutes ago.

3) Insert you own funny memory here...the alcohol is hindering my memory.

2) Sue: "Genna, I found some ravioli in your fridge. I'm gonna suck on it, k?"

1) Sue, Andy and Ben gathering everyone to the street in front of the house, where they serenaded me with the best house warming song I've ever heard. Then they set off fireworks!! It made me smile so big. You could not have warmed my house any better!!!

A HOT TIME IN THE OLD TOWN TONIGHT

SATURDAY:


10. While Marilyn was actually in Italy, we watched "La Dolce Vita." On the projector on the roof. Wine. So good. I think we're going to keep doing this a lot; Conrad has painted a screen on the wall out there, so we have a good setup. You have to be able to fit through our bathroom window, but it is so worth it--and even on a hot, muggy night, there's enough of a breeze out there that you forget the heat. A few stars, above the sounds and the lights of the city, out of view of the neighbors, and this:



Oh, and Nico's in that movie? Who knew?

SUNDAY:




9. Mad Decent Block Party: the best party in years.

8.
'Nuff said.

7. Other highlights: Diplo in the dunk tank, little kids, Conrad and Agnew's watergun fight, too much neon, neighbors.


6. Genna's housewarming! That girl is seriously the consummate hostess. So much fresh fruit, good beer, burgers, strawberry daiquiris, OH MY GOD AIR CONDITIONING, a gorgeous patio, and Byron. She has tamed that little mutt, and we spent a lot of time cuddling. Some highlights:


5. Disappointing fireworks. They sound like real fireworks, but then they just shoot a few sparks and catch on fire.

4. "Oh my God! That guy's from Women."


3. "Hey Sue, you wanna suck down a hamburger?"


2. "WHAT IS WITH ALL THIS FREAKING DANE-HATING???"

1. Ahem:

Lauren: Ugh, I can't believe that asshole. He thinks he can just molest me whenever he wants.
Me: Really?
Lauren: Yeah, I mean he just started putting his hand right up my dress.
Me: Jesus! I mean, what happened?
Lauren: Well, he was lying on the floor, so I sat on his face...

No, Lauren. Nope.


And the quotes of the day: first, from Chris D: "Scarlett Johansson's voice sounds like getting your dick sucked."

And the other:
"Shit or get off the blog."

Also, my tolerance level is back. I've been drinking even more than normal and waking up with no hangover. SUMMER!!!

I NEVER KNEW LOVE LIKE THIS BEFORE

10. One unfortunate side effect of a) knowing so many people, b) seeing all the same people all the time and c) living in--let's face it--a pretty small town is that when you go out, you tend to have the same conversation over and over again with different people. Tonight, all anybody could talk about was a) my hair (which they would then muss up--it's irresistible, apparently) b) my upcoming birthday party, or c) "Sunny" sightings. Josh Ballard saw Danny DeVito, Sue saw Charlie and the set of trailers. She was really excited about the fact that the trailers were marked by the characters' names and that one trailer door read "Charlie and the Waitress," because of course they're married in real life.

9. Blogging is so much better and easier if you do it as soon as you get home from your night out.


8. For the singles among us, tonight was an incredibly confusing carousel of sexual tension: will she go home with him, him or him? Is he really starting a fight right now? Where the hell did Sue go? Ah, it makes me nostalgic.


7. Eric likes to pogo when he dances. Also, he likes to bite necks.


6. As has been stated on this blog before, my favorite part about MT at Pure is that all the gays show up at 2, very confused. But tonight, that dynamic was greatly increased as it was GAY PRIDE WEEKEND. Everywhere, there were older gay couples looking hopeful, discouraged and confused.

5. KEEPING GETTING IN FOR FREE! How can we make him a VIP at next week's birthday barbecue? I'm taking suggestions.


4. Thank you, Christopher Davidson, for introducing me to the backdoor cheap drink loophole at Pure: Michelob Ultra. You said it was "Almost like beer;" I said it was not only beer, but it was much more than that, because it was Ultra. FOUR DOLLARS!!!

3. Virginia and Buddy. Everywhere all the time.


2. Beforehand, at La Casa De Lauren, I learned that without proper adult supervision, I will eat/snort 4 1/2 Adderals in two hours. Terrifying, then fun, then mellowish, actually.

1.
Dave P: Thank you for bringin' it all back home for Pride. Last song of the evening, Stephanie Mills? I love you in a real way.

M.Y.A.S.S.

10. M.I.A.'s show sucked. I think anybody there will vouch for me. That place was like an airplane hangar, and you couldn't hear a goddamn thing. It was worse than the Electric Factory. We left after four songs (I think).

9. OK, let's be honest: maybe we really left because they weren't selling alcohol?


8. Ugh, don't drink vodka tonics made with Vlad and no juice. And trust me, under absolutely no circumstances should you drink two of them.

7. If you're already feeling self-conscious about how much you're sweating, don't go to dinner at an Indian restaurant with no air conditioning.

6. Remember that German boy I scared off because I kept trying to speak to him in German, which I don't know how to speak? Well apparently, this is something of a habit for me, as I kept catching myself trying to speak to Deborah in slurred French. Of course I don't speak French either, whether slurred or unslurred. She kept saying, "What? What?" and looking vaguely annoyed.


5. Everybody has a "Sunny" sighting story.

4. Girl: Andy!
Me: Oh hey!
Girl: I met you at your house.
Me: Yeah, I remember. How are you?
Girl: Good. Listen, it's OK if you don't remember my name.
Me: (not guessing at all; totally sure) No, I do! Eric, this is Jen.
Girl: Um, right. Hi, Eric. I'm Rachel.

3. Steve's back!

2. Apparently, Siobhan gave me suggestions for funny things to post. Apparently, I was unimpressed. Mostly, I'm just embarrassed that I don't even remember that part.


1. I found evidence that mice had been in my bed, so I spent the night on Sue's couch. In the morning, she made me an egg. She can't eat more than an egg yet, but I'm still so proud of her.

TEXT-SAVER, 6/5 -6/9: HEAT WAVE

I'm not even trying to have a coherent weekend...it's just too much madness to pass up.

(Sorry I haven't really blogged this week; suffice it to say, the best thing that happened was at Snacks at Woody's. Three faux-queens (read: fantastically over-makeupped girls that I LOVED) heard that Sue's getting [dental] implants and told her that was "Awesome" and that she would be so happy afterwards. She talked to them about it for a long time before she realized they thought she meant breast implants. Then she realized they had all had boob jobs. I told her my new favorite band is Susie and the Implants. Otherwise, the main contributions this week made to my life are peach schnapps with blood orange soda and lots of Indiana Jones, not to mention really good quality time with my boyfriend. And Kane and the Undertaker facing off at Rustica.)

THURSDAY (show night):


Eric and I are leaving in ten minutes to see M.I.A. BITCHES!!! Barbary afterwards for Josh and Matt's party Self-Control with THE FIELD!!!

FRIDAY:

I don't work all day. I'm around; let's take naps in Rittenhouse or something. Call me.


In the evening, hair-dyeing/80s movie night at Lauren's, then PRESETS at Making Time (Pure). Let's get there early and get real drunk real fast, like in the old days:

(video: "This Boy's In Love" - The Presets)

SATURDAY:


Oh God--Roots Picnic, Best Fest, Odunde, NoLibs Music Fest. I'll be slingin' pizzas until 8; come see me and I'll hook you up. At night:


WHAAAATTT?
Outdoor "The Wizard of Oz" Sing-A-Long on the Great Plaza at Penn's Landing as part of Philly Gay Pride 2K8! I am freaking out! Please, someone, go with me. My boyfriend isn't gay enough to be interested. $5.

Later: I don't know, tell me what to do and I'll be there.

SUNDAY:

G's housewarming, and Pridefest Parade, if I can swing it. At night: Gary's party. Girl is moving next month; let's show her as much love as we can.

PS - On June 9th, if you're in Italy, say "Happy Birthday" to my mom, and if you're in Florida or California, say "Happy Birthday" to Donald Duck.

WARNING!!!

MOUNTAIN PEOPLE

Conrad, Sue and I drove up to my boss's lake house in the mountains this weekend. It was amazing and we're renting it again this summer and taking all of you with us.

Some highlights:

10. Stars.

9. A shake place called "That Shake Place."

8. Holes in the carpet in the shapes of pieces of slate and stone, with the actual pieces of slate and stone in those holes. Also, a deer head. Three fireplaces, two chimeneas, a grill and a fire-pit.

7. DRIVE-IN!!! Double feature: "Indiana Jones" and "Iron Man."

6. We kind of forgot, but the original plan was to ask the locals where to go dancing. You know, in the Poconos.

5. Hanging out in the back of the El Camino, behind the gas station.

4. Paddleboat.

3. Conrad and Sue somehow got me to play cards. I even kind of liked it.

2. We drank so much, morning to night, and didn't even go through all the liquor we brought. Also, it felt like we got away for a whole weekend, but really it was just overnight.

1. Pulled into town around midnight, stopped at the Barbary to say hi to everybody outside. Conrad left the El Camino running. We were there for maybe two minutes, then home. I had so many missed calls when I turned on my phone.

Next time we won't screw up the car situation, and all of you who I really wanted to come will be able to come.